"I Deserve what I have because I work hard": Some Thoughts

Every now and then, there is a discussion in some blog or other about the correlation between hard work and (financial) success. Usually, the blogger declares that successful people work hard; the general assumption is that because "I worked hard, I am successful. And because I am successful, I deserve what I have." Then there is a flurry of objections by readers.

I myself think that the hardest working people are the working poor. I meet many of these people at Goodwill. Often, these women are wearing the badges of their place of employ: "First Name Only" followed by "Aide." I am lucky to have met these people; they are not shopping at Goodwill for sport as I am; and they remind me of the many gifts I have been given. Yes, I have worked hard, but--I venture to say--not as hard as they do.

So here is an excerpt from the Wall Street Journal. Not exactly a liberal rag, the WSJ presents a picture of a member of the working--now non-working--poor. She is 3 years younger than I am.


As the economy has shed jobs, many working poor who in better times used plentiful jobs and overtime to raise their living standards are falling back into poverty. The increase in poverty last year—2.6 million people—was concentrated among working-age families, with the poverty rate among people between 18 and 64 growing to 11.7% from 10.9% a year ago. Among the hardest hit were children: The child poverty rate was 19% last year, up from 18%. Poverty is defined, for example, as earnings under $22,000 for a family of four.

Colette Banks, 52 years old, this month exhausted her unemployment benefits after losing her $10-an-hour job as a hospital housekeeper in 2007. She has applied to several jobs but had no luck; recently Ms. Banks applied for four positions at the Prudential Center arena in Newark, N.J.—security, housekeeping, ushering and kitchen help—but hasn't heard back.

With a full work week and occasional overtime, Ms. Banks made about $21,000 a year when she had her job—just above the poverty line. She recently applied for food stamps, rental assistance and Medicaid to support herself and her 15-year-old granddaughter. Free television has become the lone form of entertainment in their household, and dinner often consists of rice and beans. "You have to pay a little bit here pay a bit there, just to stay above water," she says.

Required Reading for the Frugal: Grocery Ads

As an English teacher, I love to read. In fact, the more difficult and arcane the better. So, though my students in Milton are grumping out ("Why is he so hard?" "He makes me feel dumb"), I just say Bring it on.

Though I wouldn't say Areopagitica should be required reading, I would say that developing your grocery ad skills is a good idea. Definitely an element of life-long learning, which is one of the catch phrases in educational goal-setting.

Since almost all groceries have closed or fled in my area, reading the ads has been a dispiriting affair. Even though my politics are far far left, I know that competition is needed so that consumers can get good prices. (Note: I am not talking about health care here. Don't get me started. Health care is NOT simply a consumer product.)

But Albertson's has returned to the next town. They advertised eggs at 50 cents! And cheap chicken! When I went into my local store, there I saw a sign by the eggs: Unadvertised Special 46 cents! Ditto for the chicken! This is great. It will only last a little while, of course.

All the food frugalites out there will urge you to
1. Know your prices
2. Stock up on sales
3. Plan your menu around the sales

Truly, this becomes a habit. This week, I will be buying grapes, chicken breasts, and shrimp. Everything else is in the freezer and pantry. Oh yeah, milk. I still have 42 pounds of coffee from the summer.

What are you stocking up on?

What We Did that Made the Biggest Difference to our Finances

There's a rumbling through the media as we are--approximately--at the one-year anniversary of the financial meltdown. No, I'm not planning to listen to re-broadcasts of the news from last year. No, I'm not going to read the various post-mortems.

All I can say is OMMMMMMMMMM.

Doesn't every single self-help thing out there--whether for finances, relationships, addiction, whatever--exhort focusing on the things you can control?

So my anniversary will be marked by a list of the things we did that made the biggest difference to our financial lives.

1. We didn't avail ourselves of student loans in grad school. We lived like poor students.
2. When we finally got jobs, we didn't get a car right away. Mr. FS was sold a used car by a colleague for $200.00! We used it for several years. Then, my parents passed on an old Volvo, which we also used for several years. We didn't have 2 cars for some time.
3. We bought a house that was a bit too expensive for us. Interest rates were high at the time (10%!). So, perhaps counter-intuitively, we began paying extra on the mortgage, because we couldn't stand it.
4. Breastfeeding and cloth diapers. The latter, surprisingly, had a spiritual dimension.
5. Public schools.
6. Sheer luck. Both children were National Merit finalists and we sought out colleges that wanted these kids. Children DID participate in this choice.

OMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.

What were your financial choices that had large impacts?

Frugal Shopping with Miss Em: At the Drugstore

I've been rather distressed to see that my recent posts have all been about shopping! So here is another one. But this is also about parents and kids, teaching them skills, and so on.

We were honored with a visit from Miss Em this weekend, her first since she became a bona fide college student. Since we like to pamper our beloved princess, we made her a giant pot of her favorite: Thai shrimp curry, which I have posted about before. The veggie base consisted of onion, eggplant (from our garden), peppers (ditto), and some amazingly inexpensive shrimp ($2.99/lb with head on!). With the shells, we made broth, in which we cooked some rice.

Then, Miss Em and I went shopping. This creates a bit of mother-daughter bonding. We do not (I swear) overdo it. Plus, it's all a learning experience. Mr. FS and I were never into hair shirt deprivation for our children. Children of 12 and up are into consumption. We tried to work with that, rather than go against it. It seems to us a natural stage. At least in the USA!

We did make a point of visibly searching for a frugal alternative for their various desires. So Frugal Son accepted an alternative to the Air Nikes all his friends were getting; Miss Em was happy with a Target version of the hideously overpriced American Girl Dolls. They were happy to have something as good as what their friends had, only different.

Once Miss Em was into shampoo, and conditioner, and make up, we learned to shop at Walgreens and CVS. That is how I learned about all the rebates these places offered. So Miss Em learned the important frugal lessons: stock up if it's free**** and WAIT till something is on sale. When she was in junior high, we spent many a blissful time poring over the Sunday ads to see what--if anything--was worthy of our attention. All this gave her a sense of frugal abundance, rather than of frugal deprivation.

Miss Em and I headed out to CVS to get some deodorant and some hair stylers. All were pretty cheap with their rebates. I like to use my rebate money immediately, so we found some great tinted moisterizer reduced from $12 to $3!

Then we went to check out. We were overcharged for the deodorant. This was corrected. Then we didn't get the rebate. Hair products rang up OK. The cashier had to create a rebate for one that didn't work.

Then we tried to buy the moisturizer. Wrong price. Then that was fixed. Our exit was in sight--then I noticed that we were charged $2.00 sales tax on $6.00. I pointed out that we don't have 30%plus tax. Then that was fixed. All very tedious. I asked Miss Em: "Would you have noticed all those errors?" She said she would have.

Hope so. Anyway, the lesson is have a total figure in your head for each part of the transaction. That way, you will notice any errors. In my years of error catching, I have only spotted a TINY percentage in my favor; about 98% have been against the customer.


****Frugal lesson: If you have 3 lipsticks stocked up, don't get another one EVEN IF IT IS FREE. Overdoing it is NOT frugal. Share!

Customer Service: Am I too Picky?

Ask. Ask. Ask.

That's the frugal mantra. If you need something, ask around. An acquaintance may have what you're looking for. If you have a problem with a store or the like, ask. You may get what you want. Or a rain check. Amy D. of Tightwad Gazette fame has a chapter on it. My frugal Dad always asked. This practice generally has a good time to savings ratio, at least in my experience.

Plus good customer service usually makes you a customer for life. When I sold things now and again on Ebay (a LOONNNGGGG time ago), I responded to the slightest complaint with a full refund. And, given the low volume of my sales, I wasn't expecting any return customers. It just wasn't worth setting into motion the bad customer service karma.

Places where I've had good customer service: Walgreens (managers often compensate for flaky employees), Belk (on my single purchase), LL Bean (shouldn't be a surprise).

So today, I decided to put my customer service chops to the test. This was inspired by a post on Ann Taylor at Une Femme d'un Certain Age (see blogroll to the right), which featured a very nice scarf. One commenter noted that the website didn't specify the fabric blend, so i decided to call the 800 # and ask. And I could not get through. And I tried twice. ByeBye Ann Taylor. Fix your phone system. There was no way to get an operator.

Then, I tried Garnet Hill. Miss Em and I wanted to buy a dress that is on special till Sept 15 from $68 to $48. This dress was very popular last year; it sold out, and there were many laments on-line: please bring back the dress! So I checked and discovered that "Yet once more" (quoted from the pastoral elegy "Lycidas" by John Milton) the dress was sold out in black and gray. And, no, Miss Em and I do NOT want rhubarb or blue. The site said "Limited to stock on hand." OK, but I just got my catalog with the sale price a few days ago.

So I tried the on-line chat. First try: disconnected. Second try: operator said that they were sold out with no back order date. I asked for a "rain check," saying that I knew it had sold out last year and that the sale price was good till Sept 15. I said I knew this was not their normal practice, but that the dress sold out within just a few days, blahblahblah. Answer: Sorry, we don't give rain checks.

Honestly, labor costs are so low that I bet GH makes a big profit even when the dress is on sale. So, for a rain check the company could have had my undying gratitude plus a 2 dress sale. Plus future sales. Did I go too far in my request? Should GH have accommodated my request?

Bad customer service from Hamilton Books a few years ago led to a complete boycott on my part.

Ditto for Dell Computer. I will NEVER have anything to do with that company again.

I don't think my Garnet Hill chat qualifies as bad customer service. But it does not qualify as good customer service. What do you think? Was I too demanding? Were they too inflexible? Did GH miss a chance to go the extra mile? Just wondering....

Student Debt and Marriage: Scary Stuff

My aversion to debt is pretty apparent to anyone who's read more than a post or two. Student debt is a vexed issue, because it is a necessity for some. All I can say is "Live like a student!"if you are borrowing money and THINK before you decide on pricey private education over a public option.

But what of those who have already borrowed large amounts. A few days ago I read about law grads from prestigious institutions who cannot find the corporate job they were counting on. Today, courtesy of the Wall Street Journal, we hear of people putting off life cycle events (home purchase, marriage) so burdened are they by debt.

Here is one fellow:

Zack Leshetz, a 30-year-old lawyer in Fort Lauderdale, Fla., has $175,000 in student loans from his seven years in college and law school. Lately he has had his eye on the real-estate market. "Everyone says that it's a great time to buy a house," he says. But that is not an option right now, he says, thanks to $800 a month in payments—and another chunk of student loans in forbearance, which means payments are halted while interest accrues. "I find myself living paycheck to paycheck," he says.

He has also been engaged since March, but has held off on marriage. "There's no way I can pay for a dream wedding, or even just a regular wedding," Mr. Leshetz says. "I feel like I'm putting my entire life on hold."

What I am about to say is probably predictable. OK. I understand about the house purchase. But the wedding? The big American wedding is a "tradition" of very recent vintage.

My own wedding cost under $50.00 and the most expensive component was the German measles antibody test required by the state of Indiana. But I acknowledge that I am a scrooge of festive parties like weddings. Still: how about a pot luck dinner? a barbeque at a park? Even a dinner at a nice restaurant for a select few. I'm sure that others of a more festive nature can improve on my suggestions.

The great Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin of Your Money or Your Life list lots of frugal dating ideas and then opine, "The best part of dating is free."

So true. Same for marriage.

Update: French Fashion Frugality is, shall we say, tres difficile

So I boldly posted on my vow to embrace French fashion frugality and buy only a few things, as long as those things were just what I wanted. That's similar to what Duchesse wrote about this morning. YESYESYES, I thought as I read her post. (Click on the link to the right). As I said, I even unsubscribed to those pesky emails, which alerted me to tempting sales.

This morning, I just took a peek (SORRY) at the Garnet Hill site, to see (SORRY) if the pants I bought ever got further reduced. Not only did they not get reduced further, they are gone. (And the Chico's pants my mother bought me are totally out of stock in black and out of stock in my size in all colors).

But Garnet Hill is having their Labor Day sale! Stuff is as low as $6.00. Even stuff I liked when I looked at the catalog. Oh yeah, and GH sent me a coupon for $20.00 off when I bought my pants. Notice how the boundaries are being violated: the sales come into your house. It's not enough to "stay out of stores," that staple of advice to the frugal neophyte. Now you must stay off the internet and throw out all catalogs and coupons that are left in your mailbox (physical and virtual).

So I figured that as long as I was writing this post, I was not filling my shopping cart. Perhaps by the time I finish, the things I liked (and the BEST bargains) will be sold out.

French fashion frugality=difficile.